Last week the traffic police suddenly became active in Bangalore and were stopping passing vehicles for licence and other checks .I was stopped too and after checking my licence the young officer whispered to me "ma'm,please wear seat belts or i would have to fine you 300 rupees next time" and he was smiling. I thanked him and immediately strapped the seat belt on and proceeded on my way. Now this is one of the priveleges that you get with age - people believe that a forty five year old woman is not out on the road to speed and kill while it is assumed to be natural behaviour for a younger person. When you do violate a rule and claim forgetfulness they actually believe you. You are allowed to be forgetful, clumsy,disorganised and no one takes it seriously. In fact they even indulge you like the police officer did!
At forty five, life is less stressful than when you are twenty or thirty. At twenty, when you behave like a twenty year old you are asked to grow up. But at fortyfive, the same behaviour is considered charming! Being in a roomful of smart and gorgeous young women does not make you feel insecure. You feel it is easier to accept someone else as being smarter, better looking and superior without any grudge.You can offer sincere praise where it is due untainted by jealousy. You dont feel threatened by anyone and there is no pressure to compete.You can have your opinion on everything and young people actually listen to you and no one considers you opinionated. There is no fear about where you are going because you are not going anywhere anymore. You find it is easier and simpler to give - of yourself and other things.
On a personal level too, the new grey hair that you notice on your head when you look into the mirror does not bother you. In fact you have stopped looking at them long ago.There is less expenditure on cosmetics and beauty treatments as you know you cant lose those wrinkles which are trophies that you get for no achievement but for just having survived the battle of life.You can still go out when you have a bad hair day - almost every day is at this age! I think the best part of being forty five is the acceptance that comes with it - facts about yourself and the world.
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